Reflections on 2018

2018 was a pretty big year for us! Nathan was assigned shore duty orders and that landed us in South Carolina! Life really is something special in the south, let me tell ya. Leaving New England was bittersweet. It felt so good to say “goodbye” to a place that harbored such negative energy for us, but we left behind a strong support system and I miss my people; I miss our little “friend family” that we had. Those relationships are treasures and we were very fortunate!

While Nathan was away for training, Landon and I were fortunate enough to spend six weeks in Arizona with my family earlier this year. It’s not always easy being away from family and having all that time at home was such a blessing. Landon soaked up all kinds of love and a special treat was, my Grandma was also there with us for a big portion of it! Landon and his great gram were the best of friends too.

Nathan and I spent our first night away — kid FREE — and we stayed in downtown Ft. Wayne, Indiana. But, it turns out, food poisoning doesn’t care if it’s you’re first date night in a year haha. Nathan spent our whole night sick and I ordered room service and went to bed. Cheers to us, babe 😘

We had a lot of highs and we had some lows. Maybe “we had some lows” isn’t entirely truthful. *I* had some lows. I’ve never been one to suffer from any type of anxiety or depression but this year brought on a whole new load that weighed heavily on my shoulders. I spent a good portion of the year doubting myself as a person, a friend, a wife and a mother. Looking around our new home in South Carolina, I could see a million things wrong, a million different places where I fell short each day. Most days I was easily rattled and my patience were basically non existent. Have you ever tried to drink from a fire hose? That’s what each day felt like almost…. every drudging moment that passed was getting harder and harder to swallow. The surprise of a second baby was even hard for me to navigate through. However, sometimes it isn’t in our timing. It’s HIS timing and I passionately believe that God doesn’t make mistakes. He gives us what we need when we need it and, we clearly need this sweet baby boy.

I learned that my biggest downfall was not speaking up about what I was feeling. The few times that I tried, the support I was looking for just wasn’t there and I would slink back in to my dark cloud. Then, I’d find a moment of serenity in my sons laughs, or the way he’d hug me so tight and out of nowhere. It’s like that hug was piecing me all of my broken parts back together.

2018 made me want to be ME again. Only, stronger and better than I have been. Typically I’m not one for New Years resolutions, I’m more of a same year, same hot mess type. If I’m being honest, resolutions were never my thing. Sure, I could sign up at a gym and never go. What’s the point in that?!

In the New Year I want to be more intentional; with my family, with the way I speak to my husband and my son (sons! Ah we will have another babe in 2019!) I want to spend more time building up the ones I love, myself included. Because hey, I’m surrounded by some pretty incredible people. I need to be a better partner to my husband and spend more time focusing on the GREAT things we’ve done and the great things we will continue to work towards. I’m making a promise to feed my soul when I need it; by reading a book, roaming the beautiful beaches and soaking up the sun. And, I want to dedicate more time to my faith. On some of my darkest days, it’s what helped me come back and I want to continue to nurture that.

Going in to 2019 with high hopes. My baby boy will be two in three short weeks (I can’t believe this is happening), we’re a few months away from meeting our second baby together, I’ve started a new job that will be a pretty huge move for our family….. I think it’s safe to say we are wrapping up 2018 and eagerly welcoming a New Year!

What are some things you’re hoping for next year? I would love to hear it ♥️

Xo.

|•| Some of our fun times |•|

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